Jean's Tree Christmas is a time of expectancy--a looking forward to what is coming. A time of opening ourselves up to the new gifts that love brings our way. And a time of reflecting upon the great gifts that have already been extended to us.
My thoughts turn to those I love and desire to bless with some small token, with a meaningful gift of some sort. God has richly blessed me with precious relationships: My Beloved Matt, whom I love so much it makes me ache, whose deeply rooted goodness, integrity, and humility always win out. Whose strong arms of faithfulness, loyalty, and unfaltering commitment have held us through the storms.
My three Daughters...my greatest treasures, the stars that light my Mother Crown.
My parents...whose greatness in the kingdom will one day be known ("by their fruit").
My "Elizabeth" with whom I walk in an echoing journey of faith and hope and love, and who proves to me by her witness that I am not alone.
My brothers who will climb Mt. Katadin with me this summer even if I have to carry them down. (I was thinking that maybe, if necessary, they could slide down "The Chimney", Dad.)
My "White Wizard" whose wisdom is so cloaked in humility it's wonder is missed by most who rush by it.
My "Peter" who is far from me in presence but not in fondness.
My dear Carol whose dogwood branches arch over me with love.
My daughters in the faith who now look upon my journey with some confusion, but one day will be reassured.
My Lord, whose arms will one day physically wrap themselves around me.
And there is still room in my life for more treasures to come...
But on this day, in this season of reflection, this post is to honor a very special gift.
A gift that only Heaven can give.
Frodo had his Sam. David had his Jonathan. I have my Jean.
Oh, we do laugh about it. That scene in Lord of the Rings where Frodo realizes that what he carries is too burdensome for everyone else. Frodo takes off alone in the boat and yells to Sam on the shore that he has to go the rest of the journey alone. Sam yells back as he walks into the water, "Sure you are--and I'm going with you!" It's rings so true. We laugh that I finally named one of my children (our dog Sam) after her. I tease her that she's my Jeannie in a bottle. (I need to get you one of those outfits!!) My kids call her Aunt, and unfortunately she's mistaken often for my mother. (I tell her its only because I look so young.) :-)
Jean and I have been friends for 12 years. Our friendship has been stretched and evolved, and been changed and purified over that time. We have both matured as individuals and our relationship has been enriched and reflects that process as well. It is hard work to be as close as we are and have our friendship reflect Godliness. And I'm blessed, so blessed to say that I believe it does.
Some people are uncomfortable with our friendship. Judge it. They blame it for things it isn't responsible for. Some are envious of it. It is only because they don't understand it. Perhaps they can't trust that two women could be so close in a friendship without it being tainted by too much loyalty, or by a a self-centered neediness. Ah, but there is no such thing as too much loyalty. There is only misplaced loyalty. A pure friendship is rooted first in a loyalty to Christ, a commitment to fulfill His purposes in the life of another, a determination to find our needs met in our Saviour so that we can give and bless the life of another and meet the needs of another as a gift from God, a gift so much more fitting than one we can offer in and of ourselves. Yes, the gift of true friendship is a calling. And Jean, I believe, has been called to be my friend.
Her calling has expressed itself in different ways at different times. It is not an exaggeration to say I would not be alive today were it not for her care of me at excruciatingly difficult times in my journey. She has been called to minister to my children when my arms were stretched to wide or were too weak. She has reassured my family of God's work in my life when they were afraid for me. She has given greatly to make space for Matt and I to have time to deepen our relationship. She has been my spiritual guard, protecting me and going before my every battle with prayer. She has often been my companion in difficult tasks. She has so often interceded for me before the throne of God that the blessings and answers that I have received as a result I'm sure that I will not know the extent of until the hereafter.
All of those have been wonderful things, but there is a new expression of our friendship that has blossomed that is the sweetest yet. It is the dance of reciprocity. When we were at the retreat, we were able to spend some time with just the leaders, Ken and Katherine. Now Ken and Katherine are an intriguing couple. She seems quite a bit older than him, and physically frail to some degree. But they are so connected spiritually. It is almost like they share the same spiritual space. As if there is a circle of three--God, Ken, and Katherine, and they commune together, and listen together, and each have their role and place in the dance and from their dance they communicate a beautiful truth that speaks forth into the life of others. They tend so gently and beautifully to each other, respect greatly what God is doing in each one as if it were crucially important to what God is doing together in them and through them. It was a beautiful thing to witness the tenderness shared between them for each other and for God's work in each other.
As we were sitting with Ken and Katherine, they spoke to us about our friendship. We had said very little about it, so what they spoke they spoke because they had eyes to see. Ken said he felt it very important to "name" it. That what was present in our friendship was very special, very important, and very powerful. It was a calling. They talked about how in the Quaker history they almost always were sent in twos: the minister, the one who had the message, and the elder, to help the messenger. He said that in his relationship with Katherine, they took turns in their role as messenger. Every relationship is different And he clearly saw a very special bond between us.
In a later session, they were talking about the dance of spiritual reciprocity. Ken used his hands as an example. "Both are strong," he said. "But their strength is different. The right hand might take the lead, or perform the action, but the left must be just as strong in a different capacity: perhaps to hold fast or to support. Both must care and tend to the work of the other."
When you think of that, and add the element then of the Spirit who moves in and through those hands, you get a beautiful picture of a dance of reciprocity, both with each other and the Spirit of God. Ken and Katherine have that in a marriage relationship. I have the blessing of that in a friendship. And I am very grateful to Ken and Katherine for helping us to see our friendship in a new light.
As I look at how Jean has been a friend to me, especially over the last 4 years, there is no other way to describe it, and so I will name it as an Act of Worship, to her Lord, to her God, to her Adonai.
Our friendship is one means through which we can worship God together. It is becoming a sacred space where we can listen to God together and minister not only to one another but to those around us as well. It is a beautiful dance of reciprocity. And it is a gift from God. One that I cherish, and will work hard to protect it through purity...through not allowing anything to taint it.
Jean and I took a walk one afternoon during the retreat to "listen" to God as we walked, mostly in silence. These reeds were dancing in the wind. The two pictured below seemed almost to be tending to each other as they were blown together, apart, and together again. It was a beautiful representation of my friendship with Jean.
Perhaps that makes you uncomfortable. Ahh, but there is so much that makes us uncomfortable only because we can't imagine that it could be truly pure. But we have the gift of purity through the ever present redemption in Our Lord Jesus Christ.
So this post is to name what has been, is, and will continue to become a true picture of friendship as God intends it to be, a picture of friendship redeemed, in purity as an act of worship to our Lord.
Jean, my friend, I love you dearly.
Merry Christmas
B
My thoughts turn to those I love and desire to bless with some small token, with a meaningful gift of some sort. God has richly blessed me with precious relationships: My Beloved Matt, whom I love so much it makes me ache, whose deeply rooted goodness, integrity, and humility always win out. Whose strong arms of faithfulness, loyalty, and unfaltering commitment have held us through the storms.
My three Daughters...my greatest treasures, the stars that light my Mother Crown.
My parents...whose greatness in the kingdom will one day be known ("by their fruit").
My "Elizabeth" with whom I walk in an echoing journey of faith and hope and love, and who proves to me by her witness that I am not alone.
My brothers who will climb Mt. Katadin with me this summer even if I have to carry them down. (I was thinking that maybe, if necessary, they could slide down "The Chimney", Dad.)
My "White Wizard" whose wisdom is so cloaked in humility it's wonder is missed by most who rush by it.
My "Peter" who is far from me in presence but not in fondness.
My dear Carol whose dogwood branches arch over me with love.
My daughters in the faith who now look upon my journey with some confusion, but one day will be reassured.
My Lord, whose arms will one day physically wrap themselves around me.
And there is still room in my life for more treasures to come...
But on this day, in this season of reflection, this post is to honor a very special gift.
A gift that only Heaven can give.
Frodo had his Sam. David had his Jonathan. I have my Jean.
Oh, we do laugh about it. That scene in Lord of the Rings where Frodo realizes that what he carries is too burdensome for everyone else. Frodo takes off alone in the boat and yells to Sam on the shore that he has to go the rest of the journey alone. Sam yells back as he walks into the water, "Sure you are--and I'm going with you!" It's rings so true. We laugh that I finally named one of my children (our dog Sam) after her. I tease her that she's my Jeannie in a bottle. (I need to get you one of those outfits!!) My kids call her Aunt, and unfortunately she's mistaken often for my mother. (I tell her its only because I look so young.) :-)
Jean and I have been friends for 12 years. Our friendship has been stretched and evolved, and been changed and purified over that time. We have both matured as individuals and our relationship has been enriched and reflects that process as well. It is hard work to be as close as we are and have our friendship reflect Godliness. And I'm blessed, so blessed to say that I believe it does.
Some people are uncomfortable with our friendship. Judge it. They blame it for things it isn't responsible for. Some are envious of it. It is only because they don't understand it. Perhaps they can't trust that two women could be so close in a friendship without it being tainted by too much loyalty, or by a a self-centered neediness. Ah, but there is no such thing as too much loyalty. There is only misplaced loyalty. A pure friendship is rooted first in a loyalty to Christ, a commitment to fulfill His purposes in the life of another, a determination to find our needs met in our Saviour so that we can give and bless the life of another and meet the needs of another as a gift from God, a gift so much more fitting than one we can offer in and of ourselves. Yes, the gift of true friendship is a calling. And Jean, I believe, has been called to be my friend.
Her calling has expressed itself in different ways at different times. It is not an exaggeration to say I would not be alive today were it not for her care of me at excruciatingly difficult times in my journey. She has been called to minister to my children when my arms were stretched to wide or were too weak. She has reassured my family of God's work in my life when they were afraid for me. She has given greatly to make space for Matt and I to have time to deepen our relationship. She has been my spiritual guard, protecting me and going before my every battle with prayer. She has often been my companion in difficult tasks. She has so often interceded for me before the throne of God that the blessings and answers that I have received as a result I'm sure that I will not know the extent of until the hereafter.
All of those have been wonderful things, but there is a new expression of our friendship that has blossomed that is the sweetest yet. It is the dance of reciprocity. When we were at the retreat, we were able to spend some time with just the leaders, Ken and Katherine. Now Ken and Katherine are an intriguing couple. She seems quite a bit older than him, and physically frail to some degree. But they are so connected spiritually. It is almost like they share the same spiritual space. As if there is a circle of three--God, Ken, and Katherine, and they commune together, and listen together, and each have their role and place in the dance and from their dance they communicate a beautiful truth that speaks forth into the life of others. They tend so gently and beautifully to each other, respect greatly what God is doing in each one as if it were crucially important to what God is doing together in them and through them. It was a beautiful thing to witness the tenderness shared between them for each other and for God's work in each other.
As we were sitting with Ken and Katherine, they spoke to us about our friendship. We had said very little about it, so what they spoke they spoke because they had eyes to see. Ken said he felt it very important to "name" it. That what was present in our friendship was very special, very important, and very powerful. It was a calling. They talked about how in the Quaker history they almost always were sent in twos: the minister, the one who had the message, and the elder, to help the messenger. He said that in his relationship with Katherine, they took turns in their role as messenger. Every relationship is different And he clearly saw a very special bond between us.
In a later session, they were talking about the dance of spiritual reciprocity. Ken used his hands as an example. "Both are strong," he said. "But their strength is different. The right hand might take the lead, or perform the action, but the left must be just as strong in a different capacity: perhaps to hold fast or to support. Both must care and tend to the work of the other."
When you think of that, and add the element then of the Spirit who moves in and through those hands, you get a beautiful picture of a dance of reciprocity, both with each other and the Spirit of God. Ken and Katherine have that in a marriage relationship. I have the blessing of that in a friendship. And I am very grateful to Ken and Katherine for helping us to see our friendship in a new light.
As I look at how Jean has been a friend to me, especially over the last 4 years, there is no other way to describe it, and so I will name it as an Act of Worship, to her Lord, to her God, to her Adonai.
Our friendship is one means through which we can worship God together. It is becoming a sacred space where we can listen to God together and minister not only to one another but to those around us as well. It is a beautiful dance of reciprocity. And it is a gift from God. One that I cherish, and will work hard to protect it through purity...through not allowing anything to taint it.
Jean and I took a walk one afternoon during the retreat to "listen" to God as we walked, mostly in silence. These reeds were dancing in the wind. The two pictured below seemed almost to be tending to each other as they were blown together, apart, and together again. It was a beautiful representation of my friendship with Jean.
Perhaps that makes you uncomfortable. Ahh, but there is so much that makes us uncomfortable only because we can't imagine that it could be truly pure. But we have the gift of purity through the ever present redemption in Our Lord Jesus Christ.
So this post is to name what has been, is, and will continue to become a true picture of friendship as God intends it to be, a picture of friendship redeemed, in purity as an act of worship to our Lord.
Jean, my friend, I love you dearly.
Merry Christmas
B
2 comments:
I love you dearly Becky. You are a priceless treasure for which I humbly thank our Father for the gift that He has given to us. I sit here with tears in my eyes and with joy in my heart to be "called" your friend.
Thank you for blessing my Christmas with your love and the love of your three precious children and family. You too Matt!
Merry Christmas.
Jean...
Jean, you are truly an amazing friend. I hope you believe that. Merry Christmas to you both...
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